Nothing Is Happening (Again)

Well
I've watched the time creep past
encouraged it, even
but nothing is happening
again

I have discovered that I find no peace
in other women
or in god
or with You

My only rest comes when I am singing
when my throat is bleeding
when I echo across distances
Hear me

The rain came and I was drenched
now the sun is out
and I am dry
I was hungry yesterday
and I am much too full today
all about me is perpetual change
but nothing is happening
again

Claudine,
you don't deserve this worship

you don't deserve this sycophancy

you don't measure up
but you don't deserve my anger
how I hate you
because I want you
and I cannot find the words you deserve
or the right tone
and the right time
and the right notes

You and I do not measure up
and the shortfall between us
is the measure of my pain
such a little ache
that tirelessly nags at me

"nothing is happening, again"