I got what I went looking for
today it sat across from me
spread upon her lips
the glaze upon her eyes
her hair was straightened
it also rested there
so many would want her so badly
I spent many hours against her warm flesh
but here I tell her
I will never have her again
No I did not know what I was looking for
It does not sit across from me
what sits there is a soul
and a beautiful carriage
a heart and mind
impressed upon and damaged
and I am more selfish
than my words dare
express

to put beauty down
is to ask for something more
but what more
I wonder
could I want from her,
from Her,
from god
or dream drink music

to put beauty down
I become so reckless now
and everybody looks
what is he doing?
he holds it in his hand
and he throws it away so carelessly
but they don't understand
and neither do I

what I am looking for is not in the cunt
or the bottom of the glass
it is not in the mirror
or the dreams
it does not exist
this lacking
this needing
it is a lie
to keep me breathing
until my job is done
and nature is finished with me

well fuck you nature,
I swear I'll rail against you
in this city and every other

she says I'm a force of nature
as I cast her aside
and I am,
I'm a fucking human landslide