is that some treacherous part of me
wills you on
to teach me a lesson
no,
not to teach,
simply to punish,
to do unto me
as I did unto so many quivering others.
I almost enjoy the way
you casually demolish
my dreadnought constitution.
It makes me love you more.
I have always had a thing for tyrants,
and tigers,
and the heartless.
I know what you're thinking.
I had that thought before.
Almost is not enough
when provoking beasts.
You saw me on TV today.
This was part of my revenge.
Just as I have steadily commanded your admiration.
Just as I have slept with all your friends.
even I am surprised
by how powerful I have become.
Still, I have the conscience you don't have
and cannot crush my enemies to dust.
Instead, I pity them.
I become them.
I dreamt of you all night
and in the morning,
bent for forgiveness,
bent for sorrow,
bent for loss.
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